What Happens When You Stop Abandoning Yourself
I woke up Sunday morning to 70 comments. Five hours of sleep, one cup of coffee barely started, and my phone was already on fire. A soundbite I had consciously created and scheduled from last week's episode had gone viral overnight. And what happened next taught me more about perception, identity, and staying in your own power than almost anything I've experienced as a public voice in this community.
This episode is not me walking anything back. I said what I said, and I stand by it. This is the behind-the-scenes of what happened when I chose not to abandon myself.
What Actually Happened
I created that soundbite intentionally. I knew it had the potential to go viral. I also knew it had the potential to flop entirely, because that's the nature of social media and I have learned the hard way that there is no predicting what lands. Two Dragon Magick carousel posts recently got more reach and engagement than anything I had ever put out. I did not see that coming. So I don't create things to go viral. I create things that mean something to me, and I send them out, pre-accepting whatever comes back.
What came back was 209 comments and over 8,000 views.
When I first opened my phone and scrolled through, I started shaking. My nervous system immediately went into damage control. Take it down. You've pissed people off. You're going to get canceled. You're going to tank your business. This is your livelihood. Take it down and make them happy.
I put my phone face down on the counter. I made my coffee. I sent a voice message to my best friend asking her to check if the comments were real or bots, because we have had bots before, and I needed to ground myself in something practical. And then I sat with the shaking, and I asked myself three questions.
Did you mean what you said? Yes.
Did you know this could happen when you posted it? Yes.
Now that it's here, are you going to stand in your power or abandon yourself?
I chose to stand. I grabbed my coffee, sat in my chair, and started reading.
What the Comments Actually Said
Here is what I found when I sorted through them with my very analytical, left-brain-dominant brain that immediately started filing everything into folders.
The majority of the negative comments said that not all witches do spells and rituals. I never mentioned spells or rituals in the soundbite. Not once.
A large number said just because someone doesn't practice the way I practice doesn't make them wrong. I never used the word wrong or referenced my practice at all.
Several said I was being judgmental. My entire soundbite was a question. It started with "I don't understand," because I don't, and it was genuine curiosity asking people to help me understand.
One comment said my post made new witches feel like they weren't enough. I asked that person directly: do you feel like you're not enough in your practice? They said no, they feel like they are enough. It was what I was implying, they said.
And that word, implying, is the whole point.
Perception is Everything
When someone tells you that you implied something, what they are actually telling you is how they interpreted your words through the lens of their own experiences, their own fears, their own stories. The words themselves were neutral. What people heard was filtered through everything they brought to that moment.
I use this example in Alchemy: on Survivor years ago, there was a contestant who grew up in extreme poverty, dirt floors, no running water, daily struggle for food and clean water. He got to Fiji and woke up every morning grateful beyond words. Beautiful beach, clean drinking well, good sleep. Meanwhile, his fellow contestants were complaining about bamboo and hunger. Same beach. Completely different experiences. Because perception is built from everything that came before.
Over 8,000 people watched that soundbite. That means 8,000 different interpretations based on 8,000 different life experiences, relationships with witchcraft, relationships with authority, past wounds, and stories they tell themselves. That is not something I can control. That is not something I am responsible for managing.
What I am responsible for is saying what I mean and meaning what I say.
Why I Got So Passionate About It
Some commenters turned the question back on me, and I genuinely loved it. Why are you so triggered by what others call themselves? What do these comments bring up in you? Great questions. I took no offense. I took notes.
Since February, I have been on a deep dive into my own why. What lights me up most in this business, what drains me, what I am actually here to do. And what I keep coming back to is awakenings. The moment a light bulb comes on for someone. The moment a witch realizes their power was inside them all along. The moment someone blasts through a story they have been telling themselves for years about what they can and cannot be.
That is what I live for. That is the flame in me that has been growing since February and that this entire experience poured gasoline on.
When I got passionate in that soundbite, it was because I genuinely want to understand people who call themselves witches but feel disconnected from their practice, so I can help them find their way back to it. Not because I want to shame anyone. Because I want to wake people up.
And here's what I say to the commenters who made me out to be a villain: if I became the villain in your story but you turned off my video and went and did something witchy, that is a beautiful outcome. I accept it. Whatever motivated you, I'm glad it happened.
What I Learned About Abandoning Yourself
A year ago, I would have taken that post down. I would have seen the first wave of angry comments, felt the fear of disapproval from people who don't even follow me, and I would have removed it to make the discomfort stop. That is how deeply the fear of being canceled was running in me.
This time, I didn't take it down.
I regulated my nervous system. I grounded down. I asked myself the hard questions. And I stood there, still shaking, and chose not to abandon myself.
By the end of those two days, I had gained just as many followers as I lost. New Coven members joined. My voice carried to the people it was meant for, because I did not silence it out of fear.
That is what happens when you say the damn thing and hold your ground. You stop performing for the wrong audience and you become magnetic to the right one.
The Bottom Line
How you interpret what you see and hear in this world is entirely yours. It belongs to your perception, your past, and the stories you are currently living inside of. I cannot control that. What I can control is whether I show up honestly, say what I mean, and stay standing when the response comes back harder than I expected.
I stayed standing. And I will keep standing, because I owe it to myself and I owe it to every person walking their journey alongside mine who trusts me to keep telling the truth.
Say the damn thing.
This post is pulled from Episode 225 of Busy, Gritty, Inked, and Witchy. If you want the full behind-the-scenes, including the shaking hands, the coffee, and the comment I genuinely could not make up about my throat chakra trying to stop me from speaking, watch or listen below. New episodes drop every Wednesday.